Got home late last night. House was so quiet I flicked on the TV for company. The Teen Choice Awardswere in full swing. At first it scared the hell out of me because as soon as the set clicked on there was only the sound of about a thousand girls screaming. I mean shrieking. ForJustin Bieber.

I was diving for the remote to change channels when I thought wait a minute….our goal is to youth-a-nize the credit union movement, lest we die of old age. I need to watch this. Relate to it somehow.

And then it happened, OMG that’s Kurt from Glee taking the stage  – I LOVE him! And he seems so relaxed and nice and well, Kurt like.  I decided right then and there that the Teen Choice Awards should be required viewing for anyone in marketing with the task of attracting the teen crowd.

Here are the results of my “study”

I can relate more to teens than I thought possible:

Choice Movie/Drama: The Blind Side (Academy Award winning actress Sandra Bullock)

Choice Actress/Movie: Tina Fey

Choice TV Show/Comedy: Glee

Big fans of all of the above. I have found common ground. Important aspect of the beginning of any relationship.

Things I must find a way to tolerate and embrace:

Choice TV Show/Drama: Gossip Girl (beating out Grey’s Anatomy and House)

Choice TV Actress/Comedy: Selena Gomez of Wizards of Waverly Place(never heard of her or her show – but she beat Lea Michele of Glee – what?)

Choice TV Reality Show: Keeping Up with the Kardashians (but at least it beat Jersey Shore)

Choice Movie/Fantasy: Anything Twilight Zone (which beat out everything Harry Potter)

EXECUTIVE SUMMARY:

It’s okay to like some of your teens favs, but don’t like them so much that you are caught carrying around a book, TiVoing it or hanging a poster of he/she in your bedroom. That’s a sure way to kill that teen connection.

Newer is better. They root for the underdog in that sense. When Zoe Saldana beats out Scarlett Johansson, Rachel McAdams, Gwyneth Paltrow and Amanda Peet for choice actress in a Sci-Fi you have to wonder – who the hell is Zoe? You should know. But again, and I can’t emphasize this enough – don’t become a fan of hers on Facebook.

Their tastes are not typical and cannot easily be categorized. Choice music female artist nominees? Lady Gaga, Miley Cyrus, Ke$ha, Shakira and Taylor Swift. Wow. Now you know what’s on their iPod.

They are the opposite of you in terms of sports. The athletes they choose to admire are from skateboarding (which is not a crime, btw) surfing, tennis and soccer. What? No baseball, football? That’s un-American!

No, that’s being a teen.

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